BREAKING THE SILENCE ABOUT TRAUMA

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. (Psalm 34:18). 

I was ten the first time I encountered trauma, though, as a 90's baby, I was not aware that’s what it was called. “Trauma” wasn’t a word we talked about—let alone understood. I knew about significant world events like the Holocaust or natural disasters, but I never imagined that trauma could happen in my home. 

Trauma (whether big or small) can severely impact our relationships and mental health. Left unresolved, it can lead to anxiety, depression, or deeper emotional wounds. 

I repressed my trauma for decades because I didn’t know any better. I thought the more I ignored the chaotic events in my life, the quicker they would dissipate. However, refusing to process the painful events we experience drives a wedge between us, God, and others.

Why does this happen? Ignoring trauma is like breaking your arm and pretending it isn’t broken. Without proper care and healing, it won’t mend. God knows our pain (Psalm 139:1-3) and wants us to come to Him, brokenness and all. We don’t need to hide our trauma; we need to invite Him into it for true healing. 

BIG AND LITTLE TRAUMA

Many people know what Big T trauma is: natural disasters, violence, or accidents. However, people may not realize how incredibly damaging little t trauma (like bullying, emotional neglect, ongoing financial struggles, or divorce) can be. Little t trauma might seem minor (like a little paper cut), but it can lead to emotional and spiritual infection if left untreated.  

PUSH AND PULL

It’s common to experience a “push-pull dynamic” after trauma because we desire connection but fear being hurt again. In my life, I wanted to reconnect with those who had hurt me because I wanted to understand. I wanted to repair the situation and have them in my life. 

Sometimes, this restitution is safe and possible, and at other times, it is not. For me, it wasn’t safe. Instead, I learned to rebuild relationships with safe, supportive people. It took time, but as I trusted others, I was able to open up and share my wounds with those who truly cared. I was willing to let my guard down and start over again. 

THE ROLE OF FAITH IN RECOVERY

Over time, I realized I could share my pain with God, too. He wasn’t ashamed of me and what I had gone through, and He’s not ashamed of you. 

Instead of allowing trauma to distance us from our Creator, we can allow it to draw us closer to Him. Psalm 91:4 reminds us of God’s intimate and loving protection: He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings, you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.

Unlike people who have hurt us, God is perfect (Psalm 18:30), faithful (2 Thessalonians 3:3), and trustworthy (Hebrews 6:18). He promises to protect and heal us, regardless of our past. No matter the trauma you've faced, you are worthy of His love, and He is ready to walk with you through the healing process.

THE SLOW PROCESS OF HEALING

Healing from trauma isn’t a quick fix; instead, it’s a journey. There will be days you want to retreat and others where you feel confident and free. Both are normal. 

The key is to invest in helpful, practical tools such as therapy, support groups, and a strong church community. Healing requires patience, resilience (skills the Holy Spirit has already equipped us with), and (often) professional help. 

If you’ve experienced trauma, please know you’re not alone. Your pain matters, and your journey is valid—and with Jesus and the support He provides, there is hope for brighter days. 

Healing will take time, but it is possible. You can rebuild relationships, strengthen your walk with God, and take small steps toward opening up to others again.

PRAYER

Dear God, You see the trauma and injustices (whether big or small) we’ve experienced. Help us remember that You see us, care for us, and are ready to help us heal. Through the Holy Spirit and the practical tools you have given us, show us that we aren’t alone. Provide strength and peace as we find rest in You. Amen. 

QUESTIONS FOR REFLECTION

1. Has trauma affected the way you view yourself and your relationships with others? Can you describe how you have been affected?
2. How can you allow faith to play a role in your healing journey?
3. What practical steps can you take to begin processing and eventually healing the unresolved trauma in your life?