Trauma Soul Care
Safe. Secure. Loved.
You are safe in the compassionate arms of God, secure in His unfailing love.
The fear, shame, and pain of our pasts can keep us feeling unwanted and unlovable. However, God sees, hears, knows, and loves us. We are always safe in God’s abundant love, no matter what.
Where God’s love is, there is no fear because God’s perfect love drives out fear. (1 John 4:18)
Envelope of Compassion
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Trauma and Hiding
When we’ve experienced overwhelming fear, shame, anger, and pain in the past, we often protect ourselves by hiding within ourselves. Over time, we become so hidden that we might believe even God can’t find us, but Emmanuel (God with us.) is always with us – even in the abuse and neglect, the pain and the suffering, the isolation and the loneliness, and in moments of happiness and joy.
It feels like there’s a war going on inside our minds. We want to respond well to difficult things – or at least not overreact (again). Over and over and over, the very things we want to do, we can’t – and the things we don’t want to do, we can’t stop doing. Too often, we think everyone else has it all together, and we’re the only ones who can’t seem to get it right.
The apostle Paul, a man who endured a lifetime of trauma and kept his eyes on the God who always loved him and was with him in every brutal attack, struggled just like we do. We can take comfort that we aren’t alone when we don’t respond as we’d hoped.
I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do, I do not do, but what I hate, I do. (Romans 7:15)
LOOKING BACK
When we look back at our [insert your word, e.g., difficult, awful, unimaginable] past, we are sure to wonder:
- Where was God?
- Why would He let these [insert your word] things happen to me?
- Why can’t I just get over the past?
- What kind of God would stand by and let someone hurt me?
We may also consider other questions like:
- Is my chronic illness, anxiety, or depression a result of my trauma?
- Is my trauma because I live with chronic pain or mental illness?
We are body, mind, and spirit, so if any part of us is wounded, hurt, or in pain, the other parts are impacted. Our past trauma affects today, and today’s pain can create new trauma.
In the garden, God gave the first two people the freedom to choose, and sadly they decided to eat the forbidden fruit. Evil entered the world, and we now live in a broken, fallen world.
Brokenness is Everywhere
Brokenness is everywhere. We are broken. Those we love and don’t love are broken. Every single one of us is broken and hurt – and hurt and broken people hurt people. It is powerfully humbling when we consider the global magnitude of hurt, pain, and heartache in our very midst.
God is the God of constancy and consistency, never-changing and never-failing. From the beginning, He gave us free choice. As people living with trauma, we are all too well aware of evil, but are we as aware of the goodness and faithfulness of God and His presence? Can we trust God’s promises to always be with us when those who should have loved us did not – or even those who stayed with us to care for us did not? He is also with us when somebody familiar (or a complete stranger) does the unimaginable.
God will never leave you nor forsake you. (Deuteronomy 31:6 and 31:8)
In every moment of pain inflicted on us, God was there, experiencing our pain with us. God was with us every moment we were isolated and alone. God felt hurt and sad with us whenever we were pushed away, sent away, or dismissed. No matter what, God has always been and always is with us.
TRAUMA SOUL CARE
Learning to make peace with the past seems utterly impossible, but all things are possible with God (Matthew 19:26 and Mark 10:27)!
We likely need care and support on many fronts – from counseling, to learning to breathe deeply, to finding/joining support groups, to practicing creative expression (just to name a few).
Whatever help we seek will be invaluable, but an essential step we can take is to foster or simply be curious about a relationship with God. He’s always ready to see, hear, know, and love us, but it’s entirely up to us to open ourselves to Him. He is always safe and never forces us – but perhaps we’ve no idea how to take the first step.
TALK TO GOD
Simply start by talking to God – as if he’s right in the room – about anything and everything (the good, bad, and ugly). Then listen, giving God space to love you. This is prayer. It’s not complicated, nor does it require any expertise. It’s just a conversation. Writing out thoughts to God is more manageable for some of you – and it is another way to “talk” to God in prayer. Sometimes getting started is the hardest part. Print out Prayers for the Journey and let the prayers on the page help you to find your own words.
CHOOSE A VERSE OR TWO
The Bible is a big book full of dynamic, powerful stories, lessons, and, most importantly, assurances of God’s love for His people. We are often encouraged to read the Bible, but being faced with all of it may feel overwhelming – so start small. Start with a verse or two and ask God to show you what He wants you to learn. Print out one of our free printable guides (like 25 Verses to Comfort and Encourage, 17 Verses to Shatter Stigma, 13 Verses to Lean Into, or 16 Verses to Ignite Hope) to find some go-to verses. Try memorizing just one verse to have something trustworthy to hang onto when trouble comes.
PRAYER IDEAS
Learn about different ways to meet God in prayer using one of the easy-to-use guides like Breath Prayers, Lament, Lectio Divina, and 50 Prayer Journaling Prompts. Gently step into the practice. No matter how “successful” we feel about our prayer, God smiles on us for wanting to take any step of faith!
Trauma and Celebration?
It might seem counterintuitive but begin to celebrate the small things – any bright spot of hope, every unexpected victory, and each moment of joy.
Our brains are wired (perhaps over-wired) to protect us, so being curious to see the joy and celebrate the little things can help our brains learn to notice them more often. So instead of receiving danger notifications (almost constantly), wouldn’t we love our brains to receive hope, joy, happiness, and celebration notifications as quickly as possible?
When we breathe in the beauty around us, we grow closer to God without even trying because it’s all a reflection of Him.
FREE PRINTABLES
15 Practical Tips • Trauma Soul Care
These 15 practical tips can help us develop healthier ways to navigate everyday life.
6-Step Exploration of Trauma Soul Care
Don’t let wounds of the past hold you back. Though healing is tough, every step is progress. Uncovering wounds teaches you something new about yourself. Curiosity and resilience give you the strength to face the past and explore unexpected paths.
God Says I Am
Do you know how much God loves you, how valuable you are to Him? Do you feel seen, known, treasured, safe, and chosen? God cares about every detail of our lives. He is our shelter from the storm, our strength when we are weak, and the one who loves us beyond all imagining. Yet how often do we identify ourselves by the single most important detail about who we are—a child of God?
A Lifetime of Trauma
I was haunted by the past that had left trauma on my soul–as a child whose mother was plagued by illnesses and navigating my chronic illnesses.
POSTS TO PONDER
Trauma and the God of Weeping People
Oh God of weeping people, hold us close to You amid our confusion and grief, trauma and unrest. You meet us with deep compassion.
Life is Rarely Red: Triaging Daily Life
While my feelings often jump quickly to red, the truth is that life is rarely red. Sometimes yellow is more accurate (like being on time for a medical appointment). I’ve discovered that life is meant to be lived in the green zone.
Your Story Matters • Telling the Story Only You Can Tell
Your story matters—but before sharing, take time to understand it. Explore the power of reflection, healing, and the story only you can tell.
BOOKS WE LOVE
The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma
Bessel van der Kolk
Discover scientific advances to show how trauma reshapes both body and brain, compromising sufferers’ capacities for pleasure, engagement, self-control, and trust. The Body Keeps the Score explores innovative treatments (from neurofeedback and meditation to sports, drama, and yoga) that offer new paths to recovery by activating the brain’s natural neuroplasticity.
From Trauma to Transformation: A Path to Healing and Growth
Debra Laaser
We have all heard of post-traumatic stress, but few of us think about the possibility of post-traumatic growth – the positive ways in which we can be transformed by our trauma. Yet this is precisely what can happen when we face our hurts, struggle through the rubble of our broken relationships, and unearth the ways God wants to use our trials to refine and mature us.
Life of the Beloved: Spiritual Living in a Secular World
Henri J.M. Nouwen
Initially written for a Jewish friend, Life of the Beloved has become Henri Nouwen’s greatest legacy to Christians worldwide. This sincere testimony of the power and invitation of Christ is indeed a great guide to a truly uplifting spiritual life in today’s world.
Recovering from Emotionally Immature Parents: Practical Tools to Establish Boundaries & Reclaim Your Emotional Autonomy
Lindsay C. Gibson
Growing up with emotionally immature (EI) parents can leave you feeling lonely and neglected. You may have trouble setting limits and expressing your feelings. How can you recover from their toxic behavior? In this book, the author gives doable exercises, tips, and suggestions for what to say and do to increase emotional autonomy and self-awareness.
Suffering and the Heart of God: How Trauma Destroys and Christ Restores
Diane Langberg
Do trauma and abuse have the last word? When someone suffers through trauma, can healing happen? If yes, how does it happen? There is no quick fix, but there is hope for healing through the love of God in Jesus Christ.
You Are Worth the Work: Moving Forward from Trauma to Faith
Juni Felix
The heartache that you woke up with this morning – that pain in your soul that makes even the task of receiving hope for today exhausting – that heartache is not who you are. The abuses, losses, and betrayals you’ve experienced do not have to continue to cast a dark shadow over your life. Your journey is not over, and you are never alone. Your situation is not your destiny, and sorrow isn’t your permanent address.
You Gotta Keep Dancin’: In the Midst of Life’s Hurts, You Can Choose Joy!
Tim Hansel
Life can be tough. Stress, disappointment, heartache, and hurt are all part of the human condition. While pain is unavoidable, misery is optional! No matter what your circumstances, you can choose to be joyful. In Hansel’s powerful account of God’s working in one man’s physical and emotional suffering, he and we discover the real meaning of joy.
Falling Upward: A Spirituality for the Two Halves of Life
Richard Rohr
Most of us may think of the second half of life as about getting old, dealing with health issues, and letting go of life. In Falling Upward, Fr. Richard Rohr seeks to help readers understand the tasks of the two halves of life, showing that those who have fallen, failed, or “gone down” are the only ones who understand “up.”
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